Am I fixable by some real attention and talk of sex? One could assume so. How pathetic...

A month yesterday

Til graduation.
So sick of Barack's bullshit. Way to copy Rosario Murillo's speech. Idiot.
Little more than a month til Europe. Thank god.
Even Bush didn't have this many protesters in his first 100 days.

I am writing only in Haiku?

I now write only
In the old form of Haiku.
This is so Fight Club.

Ugh

Being sick blows, and I made funny faces the entire time during prom. I've been making a LOT of play lists lately. I can't figure why it's 'fun' for me, but it's definitely therapeutic.

I really love the song "Sometime Around Midnight" by The Airborne Toxic Event. Thank goodness 102.9 changed it's format to Alt., because otherwise I would have never heard it. But it's a reallllly great song. :)

I've got a pretty bad Icee habit going now. The gas station people look at me like I'm crazy. Ha.

This time change "spring forward" crap has cut my day down. Granted, I was going to wake up late anyways, but still...

The jungle is dark but full of diamonds

My eyes are dry. Through all of my agony, I could never have cried.

There aren't enough colors to paint the pictures I want to paint for you.

I'd like to buy some more Goodwill furniture.

I wish I wouldn't let my parents down so. It is really hard for me to have them be angry at me for something I can't control.

I realise, again, that I'll have to get married young. Otherwise, I'd be a complete whore. Isn't it sad that I realise that?

Those Dr. Peale self help tapes just piss me off. They make me feel inferior.

I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's today and realised that I essentially want to grow up to be Audrey Hepburn's character, Holly.

I don't really understand Death of a Salesman.

I'd swim the ocean for you

I love you all so much. So much more than I love myself.
I can't begin to describe the immense despair that I'm in. I can't explain.
I don't know why I'm so damn depressed. It's so upsetting. I shouldn't be like this. There aren't bad things in my life. I have everything I need, I don't understand what's wrong.
Christmas is a very hard season for me. That and my birthday are very difficult for me. I get so depressed and I can't figure out why. I really wish I had a solution. I'm physically ill from my head. I can hardly move for my lack of ambition due to this depression.
I'm so sick of this. So tired of it.

Return to reality

I just struck myself. I used to be so well. I'm so not well right now. This summer, I could go for so long, an hour on the elliptical or biking and now, my legs give way after 5 minutes. I mean, I dn't gain weight or anything, I'm just that sick. All my energy and strength is gone. I only have enough for mandatory tasks, any energy that I try to exert past that my body refuses to allow. this is frustrating. i don't know how to fix it.